Monday, December 20, 2010

They call this soothing?

So Jackie Chan Adventures is one of my favorite shows ever and I enjoyed it very much as a kid, but man do I hate Season 5. I mean, a lot. It's the final season and it's just dumb, plain dumb. Eventually I want to do an extended review of the show, but right now I want to talk about Season 5 because it's just so terrible.

Season 5 is full of terrible things which I'll list here: Retcons, rehashing (EVERYTHING is rehashed from previous seasons), discontinuity, an abundance of kid liners, a huge reliance on the idiot plot and a much more direct focus on Jade. It's annoying because Season 4 is so good because it's original, there is substantial amount of character growth and constant introduction to new things.

The retcons are some of the most annoying, and perhaps the worst part of the season. Maybe that can be forgiven though, because the more annoying ones are the things which would be unnoticed by kids, or even by adults who weren't paying attention or don't care about the specifics. So The retcons are bad, but forgivable.

I guess another slight annoying nag is how kiddish the show became. It was always very kiddish before, but the series grew out of it little by little. In the end, season 5 was the kiddish-est of them all. It was immature to an annoying extent and Jade was a much more prevalent character. Jade's dialogue was also worsened by the heavily addition of what I like to call 'kid-liners.' A kid-liner is just a one liner you would expect to be delivered by a kid, in a kid's movie. Yeah, I know, I'm a grown man watching a kid's show and I shouldn't even argue against things which I've even said are to be expected in a kid's show, but that doesn't mean that I can't be upset by an over abundance of them.

One-liners are dumb in adult movies: they are cliché, annoying and do nothing for the show as a whole. Kid-liners are the same, except worse because they're always stupid and about kids (and honestly, who fucking cares about kids?). Also, Jade having more focus is annoying because of how flat and unmoving she is. She, not unlike the other characters in the show but is somehow worse, has no character growth and is clichéd in her own right. She is uninteresting because of how obviously American she is and NOTHING is learned from her. She is annoying and her character is paradoxical.

So what's worse than this? Discontinuity. Maybe I should have talked about this during my retcon para' but I think it's actually worse than that. While retcon at least pays attention to some of the things which have happened, discontinuity ignores it outright. This is an issue throughout the series, but season 5, once again, makes the worst of it. There are episodes in season 5 which SHOULD promote character growth, but they only get ignored which is annoying to both me, as an adult, and children because something cool happens and it's interesting and then the show is just like, "fuck it, that doesn't matter." Fuck you Jackie Chan Adventures.

And so we come to the worst thing ever: Rehashing. Every season in the series rehashes the talismans, but season 5 is the only season which has literally zero original content. Everything is rehashed from previous seasons: the bad guys, the goals, the plots, the characters and just overall everything. Retcons are enormously intermittent with the rehash and so is the idiot plot. Strikemaster Ice is a cool name, especially for a dragon, but the character went from being a badass to just dumb and weak for the sake of the idiot plot and rehashed material. I can't stress enough of how much is rehashed. Everything is rehashed. EVERYTHING. Season 5 should just be renamed Season 1+2+3+4/shit.

The only cool stuff out of season 5 is the last two episodes, which were lackluster in comparison to the rest of the season finales. So there you go, don't watch Season 5 of Jackie Chan Adventures.

No comments: